Narrator: Anita Rani
Published: 8th July 2021
Genre: Non-fiction/Memoir
Content warnings: Racist language, descriptions of self-harm
‘I’m a girl and northern and brown, didn’t you know? A triple threat!’ Trying to navigate her Indian world at home and the British world outside her front door, Anita Rani was a girl who didn’t fit in anywhere. She was always destined to stand out: from playing Mary in her otherwise all white nursery nativity to growing up in eighties Yorkshire with her Punjabi family, spending evenings in the factory her parents owned whilst trying to figure out how best to get rid of hair that seemed to be growing EVERYWHERE.
Anita shares the lessons she wishes her younger self could have known: ‘Freedom is Complicated’, ‘You Will Fall in Love and Be Loved’ and, most importantly, ‘Your Anger is Legitimate’. How did she manage to become the powerhouse she is, whilst battling against being too white inside her home and too brown outside of it?
This is a fiercely honest and insightful memoir in which television presenter Anita Rani embarks on a powerful journey of self reflection; one where the subject of identity is at its very core. As empowering as it is wide-ranging, it explores the various realities of life as a British Asian woman in the UK with a compelling account that combines a handful of amusing anecdotes with serious social commentary.
The title of the book is arresting, and Rani stays true to it throughout as she explains how being an outsider in many respects has made her conform to society’s expectations of her over the course of her life, also going into detail about certain prejudices that still exist and how they continue to apply during her career in broadcasting. There are several moments where she addresses her younger self, and these sections come across almost like a motivational speech that could inspire many readers.
At the same time, Rani also speaks frankly about how she felt obliged to adhere to the expectations of her Punjabi family and its deeply embedded culture. It was moving to hear how she felt unable to take part in certain activities because of her skin colour, and the thoughts that were going through her mind as she got married. Yet despite never hiding away from the frustrations she has experienced, it paints a very loving and vibrant picture, with celebrations of food and family occasions.
To learn about her education and upbringing was extremely fascinating; of how her parents paid for her to be sent to a more affluent school than other British Asians, where she was the only non-white pupil, often making it seem that she had to go the extra mile compared to her peers. It is clear that she has always had a natural determination and work ethic, which helped secure the internship which enabled her to work in television, while the other thing that totally shines through is her love of 1980s music.
Listening on audio really adds to the experience of reading this book. It is narrated by Rani herself, in an unwaveringly upbeat and airy tone. Sometimes she reads a bit too much like the television presenter she is, but numerous sections are given so much more character and depth when you actually hear her say the words, such as the accents she uses and the little giggles after reminiscing about particular events in her life.
Overall, a deeply meaningful and diverse examination of identity that creates a lasting impact. Rani writes with such personality and vigour that her personal story along with most of what she has to say, will be very empowering for people from a whole range of social and cultural backgrounds. Meanwhile there are aspects that will also be relatable to many. Rather than focusing on her career and the bare facts of her life, it is about the complex art of fitting in, and the outcome is all the greater for it.
I thoroughly enjoyed listening to this book. Having known Anita Rani as a television and radio presenter, it was so interesting to see her in a different light and hear her speak so personally about a broad spectrum of meaningful topics. Finding out about her experiences was both remarkable and inspiring.
My rating: ⭐⭐⭐⭐
Stephen Reads Books 